The Shock-Ra-Nome

I have been thinking about designing a DSP metronome that using hard-coded AI, an onboard mic and a instrument pickup, extracts a normalized band beat, and when the player gets off tempo, the metronome shocks the offending musician. I am thinking both 110 and 220 volt models, maybe something custom for Banjo players (440 VAC three phase). I bet it will fix timing issues in a hurry.